Last year was a crazy year for me. So I’ll start from where I left off. My lifestyle changes has basically reversed pcos. I rarely have symptoms at all. I’ve lost over a 147lbs and I’m feeling great. I am still following a keto lifestyle, because it has worked great for my pcos issues. So health wise I’m in great shape.
This past June, I discovered my fiancé was having an affair with his best friend’s wife. Needless to say I was extremely hurt and angry. He decided to tell me on our 7 yr anniversary. It didn’t go well. I kicked him out of my home, took back the mobile phone I bought him and changed my locks. The first few weeks was a struggle because I hadn’t lived alone in many years. Plus, he called incessantly wanting to work things out. I ultimately decided I was better off alone. So instead of dealing with his foolishness, I went back to university. I’m working towards a degree in laboratory science. It’s a major change for me. I’m doing great in university though. I have realized I can achieve anything as long as I believe in myself. I’m an A student and to my amazement I’m getting married next month to an amazing man. He literally swept me off my feet. Funny thing is I was so anti-relationships, and was actually enjoying dating. He didn’t take no for an answer. He told me on our first date I’m his future wife. I laughed and dismissed it as a joke. However, he was very serious. Once I started dating him, I stopped dating others. He is a very determined man lol. I’m happily in love. My family adores him and he fits in well. We have started building a life together the past few months and we’re both going through a transformation of sorts. So my life is going well and I’m probably the happiest I’ve ever been.
Thank you all for all of your support, prayers and emails. To those who are going through hard times, don’t give up, believe in yourself, trust your instincts and continue moving forward no matter what obstacles may come.
Latest pictures down below:)
Most recent pic
So many things have transpired in my life the last 2 weeks so this will be a lengthy post. I spent the holiday season mostly being sick and depressed. The sickness was due to symptoms of PCOS. Which had a trickle down effect and ultimately I ended up very depressed.
I have made so many changes to my diet and lifestyle in the pursuit of healing. At the end of October I actually had lost nearly 40lbs . So I was feeling great. Then I decided to visit my doctor for a routine check up and blood work. Well needless to say he convinced me to try a medicine that supposedly has been helping many women with Pcos. So I decided to try it for 2 weeks. After a week and a half I turned green, had extreme fatigue, and thought I was dying. After some additional research I only found one other person who had the same reaction. I immediately stopped all meds, spoke to my doctor and went on a detox. After nearly 3 months my color is almost back to normal. I’m still dealing with fatigue but it will pass soon. So my holiday was beyond depressing and for the first time in years I wanted to just give up. I’m so exhausted of being sick.
However, on new years day I turned 33 and my dad told me something that really made me smile. He said ” You’re my hero and this world is blessed to have you “. Honestly, I never knew my dad thought so highly of me. After spending nearly the whole day with my parents, I felt encouraged and inspired. Their perspective of me is drastically different from what I see. So I’ve decided to make some goals for the year. My main goal has always been my health but this year I’m going to focus more on being happy regardless of my circumstances. I guess you could say my year ended on a good note. A friend posted the image below on Facebook and as usual I decided to share.
Also thank you all so very much for your loving support. You are truly appreciated.
So today as I was surfacing through my news feed on Facebook I happen to come across a post by Mooji. This post came at the perfect time. I was sitting, listening to music and thinking about the age old question “Who am I “? Well I’ve been on a journey of self discovery for many years now and the one thing I noticed about my past is I identified myself with my environment, religion, family and etc. For the last few years I’ve been stripping it all away because I know that I am not those things. The crazy battle I had trying to be everyone’s everything, yet being nothing was a hard lesson I learned.
So now when I reflect upon the words of Mooji I finally understand the depth of non-duality and the purposeful journey I am on.
Here’s the excerpt posted by Mooji today.
” When you realise the Self, you are free. Freedom means somehow: You are always in peace, you are not being peaceful. You are always kind, you are not being kind. You are always the Self.. Not sometimes. Not mostly. And then your ‘ And then’ – stories are over. There is no ‘ And then’ for the Self. What is it like inside the body? It’s like you are space moving about in space, but not just dry, phenomenal space … Spirit Space. Intelligent space. Your mind is always quiet. Even if it is momentarily troubled, it will swiftly return to its natural peacefulness for that is the true state of the mind. You experience all emotions, even anger, even sorrow but they are momentary – they don’t become routine states. You perceive all energetically. Your intuitive powers open up. You understand things that cannot be explained. Your being will not feel glued in this body – it can move about and occupy different positions of being. You don’t judge other people – not deeply. Whatever comes, bitter or sweet, your being will embrace it as Grace. Such will be your good fortune.”
Monte Sahaja, 18th of December 2012