Tag Archives: Love

Update Time!

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Update Time!

I honestly don’t know where to start hmm… so married life has been intense and I was slightly unprepared for the eventual culture clash. However, I have adjusted and embraced his Igbo culture. Having been raised by an American mom and a Zimbabwean father, I’ve always been around various ethnicities and cultures. Surprisingly, I’d never met an Igbo person. So my husband is my first. He’s extremely traditional and a very proud Aro Igbo. These few months have been exciting, liberating, depressing and tumultuous. We married in February. It was a small civil ceremony. I desired a really big lavish wedding, but after finding out his mother and brother wouldn’t be able to fly over, we decided to keep it simple and have a big ceremony in the future when his family will be able to attend. A few weeks after being married, I discovered I was pregnant.  The joy I felt I can’t describe. It was one of the happiest moments of my life. My husband and I celebrated with family and friends. Everything was perfect. Then on April 11th, in room 13, at 13 weeks, I miscarried triplets. I was beyond devastated. All I could do was cry. There was no comforting me. I locked myself away for weeks. My heart,  my soul, my spirit was broken. I didn’t believe I’d recover. In fact, I wanted to die. Life without my angels seemed useless. Eventually, I decided to  pray, chant, and write.  With the support of family and friends I regained a little composure. I’m still grieving but as of today I feel comfort in knowing that I got to briefly experience something so magical. So I’m grateful for those wonderful 13 weeks and all of the morning sickness. My husband didn’t handle things well either. Which is understandable. We have been working hard to get back on track. I believe through tragedy we often find a deeper respect for life. So I’m blessed to continue on this journey and experience all the wonders of life.

Of course,  I have to post a few pictures of the past few months.

This is me at 10 weeks and I looked 6 months lol.

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Wedding day selfie

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Frank and I, on Easter Sunday at Moody Gardens Rainforest Pyramid.

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Civil ceremony on February 16th

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My current look

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My sweetheart Blue

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My little man, Beamer

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Wisdom by Khalil Gibran

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In the stillness of night Wisdom came and stood By my bed. She gazed upon me like a tender mother And wiped away my tears, and said; I have heard The cry of your spirit and I am come to comfort it.

Open your heart to me and I shall fill it with light. Ask of me and I shall show you the way of truth. Kahlil Gibran

Love and Truth

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I absolutely love this quote by Mooji. Honestly it couldn’t have come at a better time. My beloved Fanta passed away yesterday evening. I know many around me don’t understand how I could love a cat so much, but to me she was family. She gave me a reason to live when I thought I couldn’t make it after my divorce . She was my closest friend and my companion. I have not felt this much sorrow on many years, but in some ways I’m happy for these bitter tears. I’m sure there’s some great lesson I’m suppose to learn from all this, but right now all I feel is heartache. I have lost my best friend, but I know she will live on in all the wonderful memories she has left behind. So this post is for Fanta Marie, my heart, my dearest friend, you are loved deeply and truly will be missed greatly. I know you are in a better place and I’m sure we will be together again.

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