So today as I was surfacing through my news feed on Facebook I happen to come across a post by Mooji. This post came at the perfect time. I was sitting, listening to music and thinking about the age old question “Who am I “? Well I’ve been on a journey of self discovery for many years now and the one thing I noticed about my past is I identified myself with my environment, religion, family and etc. For the last few years I’ve been stripping it all away because I know that I am not those things. The crazy battle I had trying to be everyone’s everything, yet being nothing was a hard lesson I learned.
So now when I reflect upon the words of Mooji I finally understand the depth of non-duality and the purposeful journey I am on.
Here’s the excerpt posted by Mooji today.
” When you realise the Self, you are free. Freedom means somehow: You are always in peace, you are not being peaceful. You are always kind, you are not being kind. You are always the Self.. Not sometimes. Not mostly. And then your ‘ And then’ – stories are over. There is no ‘ And then’ for the Self. What is it like inside the body? It’s like you are space moving about in space, but not just dry, phenomenal space … Spirit Space. Intelligent space. Your mind is always quiet. Even if it is momentarily troubled, it will swiftly return to its natural peacefulness for that is the true state of the mind. You experience all emotions, even anger, even sorrow but they are momentary – they don’t become routine states. You perceive all energetically. Your intuitive powers open up. You understand things that cannot be explained. Your being will not feel glued in this body – it can move about and occupy different positions of being. You don’t judge other people – not deeply. Whatever comes, bitter or sweet, your being will embrace it as Grace. Such will be your good fortune.”
Monte Sahaja, 18th of December 2012
I absolutely love this quote by Mooji. Honestly it couldn’t have come at a better time. My beloved Fanta passed away yesterday evening. I know many around me don’t understand how I could love a cat so much, but to me she was family. She gave me a reason to live when I thought I couldn’t make it after my divorce . She was my closest friend and my companion. I have not felt this much sorrow on many years, but in some ways I’m happy for these bitter tears. I’m sure there’s some great lesson I’m suppose to learn from all this, but right now all I feel is heartache. I have lost my best friend, but I know she will live on in all the wonderful memories she has left behind. So this post is for Fanta Marie, my heart, my dearest friend, you are loved deeply and truly will be missed greatly. I know you are in a better place and I’m sure we will be together again.
One of my facebook friends shared this photo today. It got me thinking about non-duality and oneness. It’s an image of Shiva and Shakti as one. This image has been stuck in my head because it reminds me of my own journey of finding harmony within and without. The balance that is illustrated is astonishing to me. How does one obtain such balance? Is it possible for me to be so harmonious? These are the questions that popped in my head. Then the very next image that was shared was this
This is an image of Shiva as Nataraja. He is dancing. The very short and uneducated version…ie my understanding…He is dancing to destroy the darkness that is ignorance and the like. Also at the same time He is creating. So I found this yet again profound. Even in destruction there is harmony and balance. So as I reflect upon myself I see there is no harmony within. I’m always going from one extreme to the next. I need this dance in my life. I need the harmony that Shiva and Shakti have. All of this thinking inevitably guided me to one thought…the purpose of life. If the purpose for living is to wake up and realize we are one in love…in silence. That there is a single heartbeat of creation. Then I am on the outside of this heartbeat. How can I be apart of the whole when I am such a divided person? In my heart I know my truths, it is my mind which has the problem. It doesn’t want to cooperate. It’s always fighting one way or another. Honestly, if my mind were to stop fighting I wouldn’t know what to do. I wonder if this is apart of capricorn nature. Nonetheless, I will continue to persevere because I know that eventually this too shall pass.